| just sorta realized this |
[Oct. 21st, 2006|09:42 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | at the comp | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | accomplished | ] |
| [ | music |
| | nothing | ] |
i just sorta realized this about myself, i've actually become more intelligent and all about life, sorta thanks to books written by R. A. Salvatore. His books will at times, have some "thoughts" you could say, of the main character, Drizzt Do'Urden.. Everytime i read those thoughts of that part, i always tend to think on myself. i'm not sure y, but i've kinda looked upon myself and thought about my life and all. i'm not sure if Salvatore meant to have ppl do this, but i have. i think i've kinda become a better person in my own opinion. i've always been sort of an asshole, but hey, i can be nice if i want to, but i've felt no sympathy or anything toward anyone in a long time, i think i'm a little better because of it. i've always liked being independant and all, and feeling no real emotions toward most things in life is something that might help me along. i'm the kind of person that just doesn't care too about anything for too long. if my own father died tomorrow, i'd preobably not shed a single tear. not because he's not a good father, he is in his own way, it's just i couldn't really care too much for too long. it's just my nature to not think upon things like that too much. i would show up for the funeral and all, and respect my father's passing. i know it's not a good thing to think about, it's just the only thing i could use to show how i would really feel. i've put many posts like this, all thoughtful and such, but hey it's only thing i got worth saying most times. pretty sure anymore no one's really reading this, but for those of u who don't know me, the name's Matt Barnette, and enjoy my thoughts and opinions for awhile, i'm only a teenager too, and i'm told i think about stuff like this about like an adult.
Still here ppl
Matt |
|
|
| just thought of something |
[Oct. 1st, 2006|02:30 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | here..... | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  okay | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Bullistic-cause coty has the CD player that loud | ] |
i just so happen to have realized something about myself, i do a lot better on my own 95% of the time than with anyone else at all, ever......kinda weird.....i try to always make ppl laugh and such, and yet i'm better off by myself....odd....yet i think it happens to suit me in most respects. i mean, looking back at my past, my parents getting divorced, my brothers hating my mom's side of the family, me being the only damn link between them, it's like i was forced into this kinda attitude and such, sorta pisses me off at times. but well even though i seem sorta a loner, i'm a pretty good friend i think. had a few ppl tell me before i'm a good friend, but hell it aint hard to be, just kinda learn when to shut the hell up and ur ok :D
well past that whole thoughts and such, i've become to see that Myspace is like a vampire sucking the lifeblood out of LJ. like quite a few ppl apparently, i find this just wrong, and i swear i'm nvr gonna get a damn Myspace. i will piss like all of 5 ppl off by doing so, and they'll forgive me :D......i think......maybe....well fuck them if they don't XD. but yea, i'm thinking that squad of venezualen death monkeys are already deployed to go get rid of Myspace once and for all.....but they may fail.....and so help them if they return after failing....SO HELP THEM
on to lighter matters.....o wait....nothing much better than Myspace being utterly destroyed :D, i'm and evil person huh?i think i'm gonna get like sued for the like hate speech i seem to have written.....just for future referance, I PLEAD THE FIFTH!!!
hey, anyone ever thought of the possibilities of a flamethrower? cause i have and man, i got some damn good ideas, so anyway, yea good night all, and good luck with life, cause it's a bitch sometimes :D
Matt |
|
|
| just figured, y the hell not |
[Sep. 30th, 2006|09:00 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | my mom's | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | lazy | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Naruto, the anime show, it's kinda good | ] |
well today has been just one of those days ya know. it was boring as it could be for like 95% of the day, then we went to the corn maze, me, coty, and thomas that is, and had a pretty good time, met up with 2 girls named Morgan and Catherine, didn't know either of 'em and didn't care to much bout it. went, didn't get scared like at all, did think it was pretty fun, the haunting was better and all. now i'm back here typing this, and watching Naruto. now i'm talking to someone on Yahoo Messanger i aint talked to in about 4 months, having a pretty good conversation, just joking around and all. i'm not even tired from walking in the maze. i was like tired and about to go to sleep before, so i think it might've been the rain, did i mention we all got soaked? yea got soaked, but my fat is kinda water-proof :D. coty and thomas were cracking jokes most of the time, the 2 girls jumped when the corn rustled at all, and it wasn't a bad trip for $5. all in all today wasn't horrible, i'll live with this day, probably remember it for awhile too |
|
|
| i'm freaking tired |
[Sep. 16th, 2006|06:37 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | my mom's | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  from ur mom :D | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Thomas and Coty playing Burnout Revenge | ] |
i'm freaking tired right now. yesterday in Driver's ED/Gym i had to do the sit-ups physical fitness thing and my abdoman has be sore all day. went up joe's today with coty and we beat the crap outta each other with wooden weapons and coty won most of the fights. i'm probably gonna go up to wherever Axel is with thomas and coty cause he's celebrating his b-day today. i won't stay long, cause matt's a tired guy today. i've not been up to much of a damn thing new anymore. i've gotten stuck in the rut of going to school going through the whole schedule like the exact same everyday. school is going good however and i kinda like it, it's just i don't like having to go to it everyday. been reading one of R. A. Salvatore's books, Paths of Darkness. Thomas has been perstering me about getting through it cause he's bored and has nothing to do at his house. he'll end up reading it in like 2 weeks too. but well i'm on the 3rd of 4 books, so i'm getting close. it hasn't been the best first half, but it's not bad, it's starting to pick up more now. well coty's trying to get on the computer and threating to spray me with easy cheese, so i'll leave it at that today, might do more sunday |
|
|
| does anyone even read this? |
[Aug. 22nd, 2006|09:26 pm] |
does anyone even read my LJ at all? or do i just type a lot of stuff that get's past up as u go to that more interesting friend's page? i've been really contemplative lately about everything i do. anymore i think about if my friends could really be considered "friends" or if i'm just the guy that gets stuck standing near them and not really being in on the conversation. i've began to realize that inside of school, mostly not a lot of ppl tend to talk to me, but outside of it they always seem to hunt me down to talk to me. wonder y that is. maybe it's because i'm such a learned individual that ppl might actually come to me for advice. maybe they just talk to me because 95% of the stuff they talk about, i've nvr even been through, but i know so damn much i can carry on a conversation about it. have any of u realized this? any of u that actually know me, that even take a min to read part of this, which has become an almost pointless thing for me to do apparently, yet i still type it up, just because i figure i must to make someone at some point stop and read this. anyone else ever thought that someone in say Europe might read ur journal? that's a weird thought to me, i mean it's like a book that has no real end. they nvr know anything that's going on really, it's just something to do. anyone ever read another person's journal they didn't know?
some ppl might say i think about things to much, to those ppl i say "bah, get ur unintelligent ramblings away from my genius". i don't think anyone can really think too much sometimes, just don't do like 6 hours of thinking about the same thing straight....that's the only real restriction i suggest. i did that one time....my head hurt afterward. i think i might just cut this short today, doubt anyone bothers to read this anymore, bet it's because i type a lot, and not every day like some ppl.....
well hope y'all fair well enough when i'm not around
Matt Barnette |
|
|
| uh....do i actually need a subject?, if so how bout- because i got really bored |
[Aug. 21st, 2006|02:41 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | My house | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | okay | ] |
| [ | music |
| | birds and cars | ] |
well figured i'd update this, even though maybe all of 4 ppl read it...i figured i'd do it anyway. and right now i just realized i can't type today XD. but well school is going good, got teachers i think i can actually learn something from and don't like want to kill u or anything, so that's a plus :D. all four of my classes have no a/c just some fans, and only in one does a fan actually have the ability to hit me at all with some slightly cool air, but i don't complain might as well get used to it. can't say i've been up to much of anything in awhile, played some video games, went to school, played D&D here and there, not much going on. still aint tried to do much of a damn thing about anything really, like say my so far enternal curse of being single, side note: being pale as a white sheet, fat, and not being "handsome" doesn't help the trying to get a date at all. but the fact that i don't actually "try" is and even worse restraint on it cause there's bound to be at least a few not bad looking girls in wise county that'd date me, that aren't of a bitch/ho/prositute/and so on of the like- type, but well that might be me just getting my hopes up. not too worried about it anyway, i've learned a few things over the years about relationships, so if i do manage to get into one, i might figure things out a bit more quickly.
nothing has been done about my weight, i think i'll just stay my same ole chubby self for awhile, ppl know me from that. and i might get into some form of martial arts soon, cause i'm really getting interested in learning, so i think maybe when i get like part time job or something, of getting into that somewhere, preferably really close, like downtown BSG, or like maybe somewhere in norton, doesn't matter as long as i can get something that i can then incorporate into the one type of martial arts weapon i like, the tonfa, if u don't know wot that is, it's basically wot a police knight stick is, the black club, with the little handle. i'm hoping mainly to get into something that has a lot of kicks, so then i could learn tonfa, and make my own mixed style, but first i gotta do a lot of extensive research in order to find the correct ones.
i've no began to hate ppl with that fake sympathy. in gym at PVHS we normally walk around for like 10-20 min, cause it's good warm up exercise. well when it started, knew ppl in my grade, didn't like to talk to any of them, so i walked by myself for the first 5 days, and ppl would walk over and try to make a conversation with me, and it aint hard to guess y, they tried out of sympathy cause i was by myself, with no "friends". mostly they'd like try to get me to talk to them, a few i knew in some of the past grades, but just sorta stopped talking to, and they tried to bring that up, which was quickly batted away, by my normally hostile manner of speaking back with such things said as "i'd actually reather just walk by myself, so go walk with ur friends", and so forth. of course i know ppl will laugh that actually know me and read this, cause they think i'm just a corny joking dork/nerd/geek wotever they think of me, but really half the time i'd rather just be by myself, cause i'm self-reliant. i try to do a lot on my own, and i know it's partly because i've got a bad stubborn streak in me, partly due to that fact that ppl do be friends with u, then just stopped talking to u altogether, and i'd rather just be by myself, like most ppl would at times. i do have friends, most of which i know would actually help me out if i asked and the like of which, but their ppl i've known for a few years, or got to know very quickly in like a year or so. i do sometimes talk to ppl i was friends with in many years past, such as Patrik Smith, cause i've known them for i don't remember how long. sure some of them aren't cool, they're picked on for being weird, but they could care less about that stuff. ppl like thomas and coty i've known for a good long damn time, and know a lot about them, just from being around them a lot. i don't remember wot grades i met them, but i've been friends with them ever since, and i'd think it might stay that way. a few others like josh davis and mark jones, are ppl i don't know a whole hell of a lot about, but i know enough, and they'd be the kinda ppl i'd get to help me with stuff if i ever do need help, and no one else is able to help. so anyone that thinks to walk over to talk to me because i'm by myself, don't i've probably choosen to stand there with no one else near me, because i might be thinking, or not in the mood to talk at all.
and now onto another topic
i heard today that Virginia Tech had an armed killer on the campus and everyone was locked down and all. the guy was apparently 24 years of age and had been in jail for something. he had been complaining about wrist and ankle problems the night before or something along those lines, and was then escorted by a sheriff to the nearby hospital. after he saw no one was around him, he attacked the sheriff and got his gun, kicked him down and shot him. the hospital security ran to apprehend the man, and he was shot also. the man proceed to the campus where another officer was shot. and so far 2 of the 3 (that i know of) were shot and died awhile after. interesting stuff huh?
anybody else recently heard about the suspected terrorists that were taken into custody somewhere in europe, i think it was london or paris. yea i think they were headed to like california or something, and had some manner of explosive or something, can't remeber wot though, but i still think we shoulda stayed out of there at times, but we just couldn't, it'd be nice to not have any of the events happen, but wot the hell can be done about that now.
on a family related note, my brother nick is possibly going into military service when he decides which one he's going to go into, marines, army, navy, wotever. course they aint gotta teach him how to shoot a gun really, he knows how to aim and shoot, just maybe some of the technology is all he'll need training in, and he needs to lose some weight :D
u know anymore my dad has been yelling at me for being on the computer.....y i'm not sure, but half the time i'm trying to find things i can use to do stuff like create games and such, but normally i quit about 45 min into an unsuccessful attempt, do thank joe cooperstein for sending me the link to a 3D modelling system, still to download it.
that's all i got for now so ttyl ppl, and comment if u wish, just plz no typo fixing, i know i can't spell sometimes
hope y'all manage well enough when i'm not around
Matt |
|
|
| just here with nothing to do really |
[Aug. 5th, 2006|10:54 pm] |
bored, and aint got a whole lot to say, but i figure i'll say it anyway, since lord knows everyones reads this.....note the sarcastic nature of the last part. i've not done much outta the norm for me, played video games (various ones at that), been playing Dungeons & Dragons, and yes i know how nerdy/geeky/wotever ppl think it is, it's not a bad game, i mean when u got a saturday with nothing better to do, y not hang out with a few friends and act like some random powerful character, so really if u like acting things out or something like that, it's not a bad game, when u get stuck playing it with ppl u might as well want to kill or at least severly cause pain to, it don't work out well. got my schedule yesterday, it's not bad to my knowledge but it's probably not gonna be "fun", awaiting my second semester, cause i got history and 2 computer classes, so i'd like those :D, also had to wait almost an hour to get it *sigh*. and i suggest that ppl stop telling me that i make typos sometimes, like "god" instead of "good", cause u know typing a lot of stuff sometimes, it aint gonna be perfect, plus i nvr run spell check XD. also nvr run outside in 95 degree humid weather....u lose ur breathe, feel sick, and it's just miserable...yea it didn't help that i'm also really out of shape, so yay me.
and now the traveling abroad section(most of which might be really wrong stereotypical things, so no correcting, i know i'm probably wrong :D): ok well apparently there's still a war going on, ppl got evacutated from the middle east or some where in that area, every other nation might hate us.....wot a surprise there, the french still haven't really "won" a war on their own, that i know of, scotish and irish ppl are still cool :D w/their drinking games and such, who can't love them?, the canadians still haven't gotten a full army, and past that right now, don't care :D
o and for those of u that have nvr read it go here >>> www.leasticoulddo.com
funny comic, pretty perverted and all, and u might go to the "first" button under the comic strip, and read from there, trust me the art is horrible, the jokes are just ok, but things pick up i swear |
|
|
| Been thinking bout this stuff for awhile |
[Jul. 17th, 2006|03:02 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | My house, at my computer | ] |
| [ | mood |
| |  grateful | ] |
| [ | music |
| | Def Lepord, some random song, i aint paying attention | ] |
well i've been thinking bout myself and reflecting on wot ppl have told me they think of me, and wot they like or hate bout me. most times ppl tell me i aint a bad guy in general. normally i'm in a good mood or at least, and normal, unaggravated/unpissed/calm attitude toward things. recently i've thought bout myself and how i am a good or bad guy. in the bad case, i'm about as stuborn about some things as i can be, blame my genetics there. also i can be an asshole bout things to ppl, but my friends, for the most part, know i am like that a lot, but i don't mean to try to make ya mad most times, just messing with u. i've been told by a few ppl that i tend to be "short" or just generally snappy with answers and all, like stuffs gotten on my nerves, but well hey it normally does, but i tend to not do that stuff.
in the good case, which is probably longer, i just tend to joke around, and be a god guy bout things. most times if i loan something to someone like money, a game of some sort, or any misc item, i just tell them to give it back to me in the same amount/condition, or if they break it or lose it and can't return it to me within a month, just give me a new one when u get the chance. so in possesion terms, i'm pretty nice bout things, do like to get things back in the amount of time i tell ppl to give it to me, and when i finnaly get my liscense, hell i'll just come up ur house and haggle with ya about it :). i'm told by damn near everyone i know, i got a really good sense of humor, u can call me every insult, derogatory (i think i spelled that right, but don't get on me bout it if i didn't) term, and racial associated slur u want, it aint gonna phase me, hell i might even laugh at a few and tell they're true. it also helps to hear that stuff most days from my friends, cause hell i know they don't mean it, and it allows me to hear them and not care, so i can thank them for something at least :D. i've been told by a few ppl that i'm very "together" for a teenager, and wot i believe that means at least, is that i'm not depressed or worried about wot ppl think, now i might be wrong, but also it could mean that i got a mind set that allows me to deal with things that might make some ppl mad, sad, and etc. idk exactly wot ppl may have meant, i didn't ask. also another thing that sometimes helps thing sometimes, in the fact that i tend to stay outta things i'd rather not know.
now on to other things i've been thinking about, and just for those that have actually read this far, if u don't want the last 2 months worth of thinking, i suggest leaving now :) just figured i'd warn ppl
now like i've said i've been thinking bout a ton of stuff and wot ppl have said they like and/or hate bout me. i've also thought bout how i am generally a good/bad guy bout things. i think one thing that helps is i do try to not say things that may get me in trouble in some way, or that might upset ppl in some ways sometimes. but sometimes i say it anyway, hell everyone does sometimes, ur just in that asshole mood that day. recently i was talking with one of my best friends just bout random things, wotever popped into our heads, and he said basically this to effect "u know i think there's one reason that ur a good friend, and ppl u think would nvr have anything to do with u, actually talk to u and hang out with u; because u can talk about damn near anything for hours, and half the stuff u nvr even experienced."
i know that's basically true, and mainly cause i may not be smart in a lot of things, i tend to figure out somethings by myself, with no help at all. i've talked with a few ppl bout history, science, and all for hours, had debates/arguements bout the stuff, and learned and gave knowledge during that time. i've also been told that since i know that my friends will do wotever they want within their moral standards, that i'm a good guy bout that stuff too. like one night, and some ppl may know of this stuff already too but hell u'll figure it out if u were told, 2 of my buddies went to a party at somebody's house, and they came back to my house that night, and i gave them a "safehouse" for the night basically. but no one should get any ideas that they can come to my house whenever they want in that state.
and i know that some ppl may hate a lot of stuff about me, for wotever reason, and to tell ya the truth, bout the only thing i'd tell them, and i'd do this face-to-face, is "does it look like there's a drop of 'give a damn' in my eye?" cause i really don't care wot most ppl think of me, yea i do try to be a good guy bout things, and i do like to have ppl not mind being round me, but hell if they don't like me, let them continue with that. i tend to make friends with ppl that i can get along with, and not the assholes/bitches/etc that hate me, and i'd rather stay away from. some of my friends might hate a few things i do, might hate the way i act in some situations, might hate me for damn near anything i've done, but hell sometimes i might hate some of the things they do. cause like all friends u'd rather ur friends be good ppl, or at least act decent in some situations that they don't or not do something that could end up ruining their life in general, but if they end up doing it, ur not the person that can stop them, or if u could, sometimes u just can't.
i know a lot about things i've nvr experienced through my friends, family, and my own research or thinking about, and i'm glad i have all that knowledge, it'll me and the ppl i know in my lifetime, which is hopefully long enough for me to enjoy.
and on a lighter note, i still hate the Canadians and French, and sometimes the British and Arabs too, for general reasons too :)
and lastly, i want ppl to know that after i've said all that, and u've possibly read all that, i'm still a stubborn as hell, southern accented redneck, and hopefully ppl don't mind me and my quarks, or wotever the hell they're called these days, but the stuff that's wrong with me, cause y'all know i don't mind wot's wrong with y'all most times
take care of yourselves and hopefully others too
Matt |
|
|
| well, aint been on here in awhile |
[May. 12th, 2006|09:21 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | my mom's house | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | cheerful | ] |
| [ | music |
| | does a tv count? | ] |
well i figure, y the hell not update this here thing, aint had a lot goin on really once i think about it.
school- well had my SOLs this week; Earth Science and Geometry, and got a good enough score to have a good exam grade since i don't need to take any of them >:0 wot now ppl, gosh all those who have to take them......u suck
ok beside that, not much goin on in school....wot can i say, schools sorta dull
friends- still got the same ones to my knowledge, unless one or two hate me now or something, thomas as always is like a wandering soul, hell i half the time it's pointless to try to find him; john.....well he's just gay....; coty as always seems to nvr get to drag his ass up here....he needs to get a drivers license for god's sake; just about everyone else is about the same, as u possibly could tell, anybody i didn't mention, well y'all are the same old ppl just as thomas, john, and coty, as always.....sigh....boring ass ppl
home- when school ends i plan to start working out, and buying some tonfas (for those of u who don't know wot those are, think 2 police batons, with the long end running down the forearm) and losing weight/gaining muscle from now on, cause i think i need to kinda even myself out little bit more, height might not go up anymore *sigh*
abroad- nothing......everything is just being boring or in france's cause....gay....
and now for a quote from a historical figure: I am not a crook -Richard Nixon; and o yea we believed him....
that's all |
|
|
| well....this week in my life.... |
[Apr. 26th, 2006|09:39 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | sitting at my house comp | ] |
| [ | mood |
| | awake | ] |
| [ | music |
| | hum of my comp, and some peepers(birds...annoying ones) | ] |
well so far this week has been only mildly entertaining
school-....nothing IS GOING ON....cep the whole....trying to figure out how the hell Clendenon managed to not get a grade for me on 2 worksheets I KNOW I DID and turned in....i think it's the fact he spaces out or something...idk...all my other classes....i seem to be doing good in...like keyboarding (YAWN), 20th century history...easy class....but don't take it...it not count for anything...i got stuck in there, Geometry, for once i'm doing good enough to allow me to breathe a sigh of relief, YES
friends- well not a whole lot going on, still got mostly the same friends, few of them i don't talk to much for various reasons the more prominent being, nvr really see them, or just don't stop in the hall to talk, that's about it
hobbies- well been looking at training and practice weapons for sword fighting, martial arts and the like. also been looking for some local classes for weapons, but most u need be 16, and any for younger are too far to drive to. also still playing Magic: The Gathering...no mocking....all jokes have been made...anyone making a new wisecrack will have their skull cracked:)
abroad- for all those who like to travel abroad i know a little of a few current events, thanks to Yahoo news XD. Well the British Parlament seems to be....yet again debating some british stuff i don't try to understand...something about like tourism or something like that; Ireland had some odd little union protest something, and well they kinda got thrown in jail...they assumed they were jsut drunk hehe.; France...i think they had some govermental arguement about cheese and how stinky good cheese could be...but who cares; and really that's about it...o and Mexico is trying to get the U.S. to allow their ppl to come to America...and the U.S. was all like PFFFFFFTTTT.....yea right.... |
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
| |
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=88.8){kind=small}
va_roman_90's journal
not in the happy way though